Courtship as a vocation and path of self-giving
Courtship is not a parenthesis in the Christian life, but a true call to love like Christ.
Just as marriage is a vocation to unconditional self-giving, courtship is a time of discernment and maturation in love. It is the stage where two people get to know each other, discover each other, and prepare to decide whether they want to give themselves to each other forever.
A time of discernment and grace
Every Christian is called to holiness —including those who are dating—. This time is not a pause, but an opportunity to grow in faith and virtue. Living courtship with God at the center means letting Him give meaning to the relationship: illuminating affections, purifying intentions, and making love fruitful.
When a love brings you closer to God and helps you love others better, there is a Christian courtship. The more the couple love each other, the more capable they are of loving God, and vice versa.
“The heart has been created to love. Let us therefore bring Christ into all our loves.”
Learning to love
To love is not only to feel, but to learn to give oneself. Courtship is a school of love where virtues are forged: respect, patience, generosity, and fidelity. Small gestures —listening, yielding, waiting— prepare for a love that lasts.
It is also a time to be formed and grow together. Reading, dialoguing, sharing concerns about faith and marriage helps to build on rock. It is important to allow oneself to be accompanied, to seek counsel, and to learn from those who are already walking that path.
Living love with delicacy
Authentic love cares and respects. Chastity is not a denial of love, but its protection. It teaches how to love without using, to wait in order to give oneself completely, to discover the beauty of the beloved person as a gift. Christian courtship is not measured by the intensity of desire, but by the depth of respect and the truth of commitment.
To love is to help the other to be holy, not to be an obstacle on their way to God.
Joy, friendship, and mission
Courtship is also a time of friendship, laughter, and shared life. It is not about closing in on the relationship, but about opening yourselves together to the world: serving, doing apostolate, living the faith with joy. A Christian couple do not only love each other: they are a witness to the love of God in the midst of the world.
The strength of the sacraments
Couples who pray together, who go to Mass, who go to confession, who put God at the center, experience that their love becomes stronger and freer. In the sacraments one finds the grace to forgive each other, to understand each other, and to grow in communion.
Courtship is, ultimately, a vocation to true love, an invitation to learn to love as Christ loves His Church: with patience, with tenderness, and with self-giving.